I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
