I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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