Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Do vagina's smell?
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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