yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
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