it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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