its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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