I heard we made out
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize