Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
