no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize