How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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