I think i sorta joined a cult last night
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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