i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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