so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize