She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize