he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
