do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
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