This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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