My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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