this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
