O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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