Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
