Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
