well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I just forgot I was standing up.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize