Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
