He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Randomize
