Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
