We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
