I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
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