dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
