What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
