dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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