I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Randomize
