why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
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