I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
