Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
