ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
