so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Randomize
