Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Randomize
