Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
This baby is an asshole
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize