dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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