is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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