Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
