Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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