that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
