omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Randomize
