Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize