addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
