i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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