Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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