Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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