I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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