I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
